8 practical tips to help you stay friends
Did you get on really well with your guy when you were together, and don’t want to lose the friendship between you? If it was just your decision (or just his) to put an end to the relationship, the chances of him wanting to keep seeing you as a friend are slim. On the other hand, if the break up was a mutual agreement, the chances are better that you will stay in contact with one another, as long as the separation was amicable. Here are a few tips to help avoid losing him as a friend.
1/ Don’t wait until things are really awful before you break up
When you start to sense that things are going downhill in your relationship, and that it is clear to both of you, don’t wait until things get really bad before you separate. When we let things drag on too long, it can end up in both parties getting really sick of each other, which in turn can lead to saying things we might regret. Make the break as soon as you know for sure that things aren’t going to work out.
2/ Don’t be afraid of communicating
When things are left unsaid, there is a high chance of fights brewing afterwards. To separate on good terms, it is necessary to be honest and to communicate as soon as you realise things are no longer working out.
3/ Be ready to take some of the blame
Never blame everything automatically on your ‘future ex boyfriend’ -always ask yourself first if you were partly to blame. In a couple, it’s never just the fault of one person.
4/ Explain the reasons for the break up
Honesty, it’s the only thing that’s really important. If you want to stay friends with your ex, don’t hide the reasons for your separation from him. And vice versa. It’s a good way to part on good terms.
5/ Be humble
If it is you who chose to break up with him, try to be as humble as possible and accept his anger. He has the right to be sad and to express himself in a way that he can.
6/ Don’t show off your new boyfriend to him
Although it’s true that he needs to get used to the fact that he doesn’t “own” you, you should still avoid flaunting your newest conquest in front of his face…. Put yourself in his place.
7/ Don’t call him your ex any more, just call him your friend
A word can change a lot of things. By continuing to present him as your ex in public, it makes it more difficult to move towards a more normal friendship. Call him your friend, that’s all. It’s what you want, isn’t it?
8/ Don’t stay friends if either of you still has feelings for the other
If he is still in love with you and you know it, don’t play with his feelings, and cut the whole relationship short, as friendly as it may be. Only time can change things in this case.