It has to be said, coupled up life is far from the fairy tale we often see in the movies. Once the passion of the first few weeks wears off and the thrill of discovering each other passes, we can fall quickly -often too quickly -into a routine. Which isn’t necessarily bad, and is simply necessary to make daily life run smoothly. But how do you avoid getting stuck in a rut, and how can you keep the spark alive in your relationship? Here are a few tips to re-ignite it!
Go to bed….together! But before getting into details, there is one proviso: this article won’t stop you doing the 6 gross things all couples do in secret that we told you about in a previous article! Quite simply because, it must be admitted, these six things form part of an intimate relationship, and for that we wouldn’t change them for the world. But, in between these routine moments, be aware that it is easy to bring a little spice back into to your love life! For example, make sure that you go to bed together every night, at the same time, even if that doesn’t necessarily mean going to sleep at the same time every night. According to the esteemed Dr. Goulston: « Happy couples resist the temptation to go to bed at different times », even if they don’t get up at the same time. However, it must be acknowledged that not everyone is in agreement with this, as some people believe that sleeping apart can be beneficial for a couple. But for our part, we strongly believe that sleeping together allows you to share a special moment with each other, just before going to sleep. This ensures that the person we love is the last thing we see and think of before going to sleep, which is fantastic for reviving loving feelings!
Also according to Dr. Goulston, it is important that a couple have shared interests. « Doing things together unites a couple », he says. So as well as having the same interests, you have to match the theory with practice: it’s time to actually do the same activity together, like the renowned couple Liv Boeree and Igor Kurganov, who do all their activities together. Without going to that extreme, it’s important to try and find an activity that will bring you together at various times in the week. It could be doing the gardening, going bowling, or even just watching a series together. It is imperative that you associate a few activities that you enjoy with your other half. To use this tip to even better effect, try out new things, to get out of both of your comfort zones!
Physical touch is also very important in a relationship. Make an effort to add a tactile aspect to your relationship in daily life. We all know it only too well, work problems or family issues have a tendency to affect us, and we can take it out on the person with whom we share all our days and nights. Mistake! Your partner is not your punching bag. By contrast, you partner is above all someone who needs to hear how much you love them, and how interested you are in them, even if that is tiring from time to time. Showing mutual affection for each other can set the tone in your relationship for the rest of the day, and ensures that you both feel confident in yourselves and in the relationship. By this rationale, psychologists also recommend that you embrace your partner every day, if possible. « Our skin needs memories of positive touches » they explain. It is also important that couples say hello and goodbye with a kiss or a hug. So now you’ve heard it, keeping the spice alive in your relationship is not only important for the long term survival of your relationship, it’s equally important for your own personal well being. So what are you waiting for?!